Self Improvement and Growing

A summary of tips, processes and methods that I (try to) use to improve myself.

Originally a talk by Josh Kaufman

Deconstruct the Skill :

• Break the skill down into manageable components.
• Identify the specific aspects you want to learn and focus on the most essential parts first.

Learn Enough to Self-Correct :

• Gather three to five quality resources (books, videos, courses) related to the skill.
• Use these resources not as a procrastination tool but to gain just enough knowledge to begin practicing and correcting mistakes.

​​​​​​​Remove Barriers to Practice :

• Identify and eliminate distractions (like TV, internet, etc.) that hinder your practice time.
• Utilize willpower to create a dedicated practice environment free from interruptions.

​​​​​​​​​​​​​​Practice for at Least 20 Hours :

• Commit to dedicating at least 20 hours to practicing the skill over a month (roughly 45 minutes a day).
• Acknowledge the “frustration barrier” and persevere past initial difficulties to benefit from your investment in practice.

Originally a talk by Prof. Jordan Peterson

Shift Focus Away from Yourself :

• When in a social situation, consciously redirect your attention from your feelings of anxiety to observing others.
• Pay close attention to people's behavior and reactions to help ease your internal focus.

Engage with Individuals :

• In group settings, instead of speaking to the entire group, engage with one person at a time. Treat the group as a collection of individuals, not one large audience.
• This approach allows you to communicate more comfortably and helps you feel more connected.

Develop Social Skills :

• If you struggle with basic social skills, consider behavior therapy or social skills training to learn and practice effective social interactions.
• This can help you develop the confidence needed to engage with others effectively.

Pay Attention to Feedback :

• Cultivate the practice of actively listening to others and interpreting social cues. This will help you understand the dynamics of a conversation better.
• Look for feedback, both verbal and non-verbal, to adjust your communication style accordingly.

Embrace Discomfort :

• Acknowledge that feeling awkward is part of the learning process in social interactions. Accepting discomfort can help you push through anxiety instead of avoiding it.

Learn from Criticism :

• Be open to receiving feedback, even if it comes from those you consider enemies or critics. This information can provide valuable insights for personal growth.
• Reflect on accurate critiques to help you develop and strengthen your social abilities.